


Ineffable Family

by ServantOfMischief



Series: Family, Friends and Pet Snakes [1]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Child, Family Bonding, Family Drama, Family Feels, First Crush, First Day of School, First Pet, First Steps, First day of kindergarten, Fluff, Gay dads, Healthy Relationships, Human AU, Human Aziraphale (Good Omens), Human Crowley (Good Omens), Humor, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), M/M, Original Character(s), Teenage Drama, healthy family relationship, protective Babylon, teen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-03
Updated: 2019-09-30
Packaged: 2020-10-06 06:28:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 17,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20502413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ServantOfMischief/pseuds/ServantOfMischief
Summary: Babylon is quite the lucky child. She's got two adorably dorky dads. She hopes they'll never change.I do not consent to my work being reposted, or used in any unofficial apps like Fanfic Pocket Archive Library (Unofficial) or the like!





	1. Welcome

**Author's Note:**

> Because people liked Babylon and I liked Babylon and I am thirsty for some good ol' sweet human family au
> 
> I do not consent to my work being reposted, or used in any unofficial apps like Fanfic Pocket Archive Library (Unofficial) or the like!

“This is your home, pumpkin.” Crowley says as he strides into flat in Mayfair, Aziraphale right behind him with two bags full of clothes and other necessities. The one-year old his Crowley’s arms look around curiously, orange eyes wide and her thumb cemented to her mouth, idly chewing on said finger with her three baby teeth. As Aziraphale goes about dropping the bags in the pre-prepared bedroom for the baby currently being carried around by his husband. The word still makes him tingle. He decides he can pack out her things afterwards, right now he wants to join in on the tour of their daughter’s new home.

When he comes out of her room, he sees that Crowley is showing the girl the man’s hobby room. He is very proud of the plants in his hobby room, and rightly so. They are absolutely stunning.

“When you get older, I’ll teach you how to grow them. You need to be firm-“

“Firm is fine, just don’t scream at them like your father does, my dear.” Aziraphale says, coming up behind them and tickling the girl beneath her chin. The girl giggles and hides in the crook of Crowley’s neck, who gives Aziraphale a blank look from behind his sunglasses. Carefully, the blonde reaches up and pulls the sunglasses off of his husband’s face. Within the safe boundaries of their home, Crowley accepts that. Out in public, on the other hand, he feels much better with the shades on. The one-year old looks up and giggles, reaching up to yank at Crowley’s shoulder length hair.

“I’m not screaming, I’m disciplining.” The redhead tells Aziraphale pointedly, and Aziraphale turns them around to continue the tour.

“Of course you are, love.” He says in a tone that tells Crowley that he really doesn’t believe him. They show her the kitchen, already having been made childproof, her chair by their dinner table, the living room, the sleek, minimalistic furniture made somewhat homey by tartan-clothed pillows and blanket. Then they bring her to her room, and lets her down onto the floor and she crawls quickly across it, eyes on a prize. She grabs the stuffed snake by the crib and inspects it, glancing at the stuffed dog beside it, before hugging the snake close, ignoring the stuffed dog. Aziraphale sighs as Crowley smirks at him, conceding defeat.

But instead of saying anything, the two just watch the girl explore her new room. The crib is a curious thing, they realize, as she grabs the bars to lift her upper body to see into it. Then she drops back to the ground and crawls over onto a small chest. She pats at it, not sure how to access everything inside it, and quickly grows bored of it. She crawls over to her new fathers and press herself between their legs, crawling down the hall and into the living room, stuffed snake still in a tight grip.

“She’s quite fast.” Aziraphale says as they follow her, Crowley making an agreeable noise behind him, watching her explore the living room. The couch’s texture is interesting, but she can’t reach up to the edge, so she moves on. She finds the tv-table, and grabs onto the knob in an attempt at opening it. It is also made baby-safe, and it doesn’t budge much, just enough for someone who understands the mechanism to sneak a hand in and opening it. As the baby has never seen this before, she doesn’t understand how to open it properly, and just keeps on pulling and pulling until she gives up. There is more to explore, isn’t there? She grabs her snake again and moves further in after glancing up at the men who just watches her with avid interest. She regards them for a moment before she moves on, on her own. The kitchen is much the same, no matter what she tries and she sits back, hugging her snake close to her. Crowley and Aziraphale worries that she’ll start crying but she turns around to look at them with the most adorable pout on her face. She crawls over to them, tugs on Aziraphale’s pants and he picks her up. She pouts as she drops her head against his shoulder with a loud _thunk_, blowing a raspberry.

It prompts laughter out of the two adults who share a glance.

“Welcome to your new home, Babylon. Don’t worry, you’ll get in there one day.”


	2. Kindergarten

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Proud dads, really proud dads

It’s Babylon’s first day at kindergarten. She’s not appearing nervous, outwardly, but Aziraphale and Crowley had been talking about one of them staying for a little bit when dropping her off in the mornings until she got used to it. The teachers at the kindergarten agreed that it would be a good idea, but that their daughter also needs to learn that they won’t stay with her the whole day, therefore they urged that the new fathers didn’t stay longer in the mornings to say goodbye for too long a period. Crowley looked like he had plenty to say on the matter, but Aziraphale held him back and deferred to the knowledge and experience of the kindergarten teachers.

The first day is a complete disaster. Babylon would absolutely _not_ let Aziraphale go, so his bookshop stayed closed the entire day. The second day is only slightly better. The moment Babylon is down for her nap, Aziraphale leaves, under the promise that the kindergarten teacher will call if Babylon grows to be hysterical when she notes his absence upon awakening. Aziraphale barely reaches his shop before he has to turn around and return to the kindergarten because Babylon kept crying out for her daddy.

The fifth day is a little bit better. Crowley is there too, and they both explain that they have to go now, but that they will definitively come back. She looks unconvinced, before the kindergarten teacher grabs her hand and tells her that they can watch from what she dubs “The Window”. They can see how her lower lip trembles as they leave, and the two clutch at each other’s hands as they walk out the door, both of them wanting to go back inside and tell her they’ll stay today, to just give in an do as she wants. They barely round the corner of the building before there’s a muffled shriek and the sound of hands hitting against glass. They turn and see Babylon standing by a window, face pressed into it as she stares at them. They walk over and crouch down, Aziraphale letting his hand press against the glass where Babylon’s hand is on the other side. She blows a raspberry and the two laughs, and that is apparently enough. She turns towards the kindergarten teacher and lets herself be carried back into the department.

Suddenly it all seems to be working out rather well. Babylon just needs to know that it is okay for them to leave her there for a few hours every day, that it isn’t so bad.

The sixth day of Babylon’s first week at kindergarten is a Saturday, and Aziraphale and Crowley both have the day off. Aziraphale because his store is open at very odd hours and he decides that today he wants to stay home with his family, Crowley because he trusts his employees not to muck up his own flower shop.

Crowley is currently playing with Babylon on the floor as Aziraphale is making them a rather lovely breakfast when suddenly the ginger calls on his husband, who almost drops his kitchen utensils at the other man’s loud shout. The blonde rushes out of the kitchen, worried.

“What is it?”

“Look, look!” Crowley hisses, gesturing to Babylon who is by the living room table and is pulling herself up. Now that is nothing new. She’s been doing that since before they took her home with them, but if Crowley is so eager to show him something, there must be something new. And there is. Babylon has pulled herself up completely and looks at the both of them, tilting her head and releasing a confused sound. Crowley is sitting on the floor, waving his hands.

“Come here, pumpkin!” Her father’s excitement rubs off on her and she carefully turns around, letting go of the table, and she’s standing on her own, and that always makes Aziraphale’s heart swell with pride. What nearly makes his legs give up on him though, is when Babylon takes one hesitant step towards them, then another, and when she feels a bit surer of herself, she moves a bit faster, but not by much, and falls into Crowley’s arms.

“Oh you did so good! Yes, you did! Walked seven whole steps all on your own, you did!” He rolls onto his back, holding Babylon high in the air and she squeals happily, loving it when she’s hoisted up in the air like this.

“You see that, angel? Seven steps! Seven whole steps already! She’s a genius, she is!” Aziraphale nods, not able to hold back a wide smile at their daughter’s achievement and his husbands’ excitement. But he laments the fact that they didn’t manage to catch her first steps on video. So after this they leave Aziraphale’s ancient video camera out just in case they need to hastily record something later on. Babylon seems to enjoy her fathers’ excitement and keeps on practicing walking around the apartment. She really enjoys it when they cheer her on.

But things go rather slow when she’s walking on two legs instead of crawling on all fours, and her fathers are both rather thankful for the fact that she still wants to more walk than crawl. It makes it easier for them to keep up with her.

It doesn’t last long. Once she’s confident in her balance, Babylon can suddenly take off running, but even if her balance is better, she doesn’t always remember to bend her knees when she runs, and it often ends in her falling flat on her face. The first time both her parents and Babylon herself are shocked, and she quickly turns towards them and sees the expression on their faces. They do not manage to cover up their worried expressions in time and a wail erupts from her throat.

They’re more careful after that. If they’re sure that she doesn’t actually hurt herself, they smile and reassure her that everything is alright. Aziraphale sets up his video camera in the living room, hoping to shoot a small video they can send to their family with Babylon’s progress. And something they can keep to themselves too, to watch once the girl has grown up. Tiny little memories forever kept.

“Babylon, darling. Won’t you come out here?” And the toddler slowly exits the hall, her stuffed snake clutched closely to herself, with Crowley right behind her. She looks back to Crowley, a little bit unsure and he crouches down, urging her to go on.

“Come here, my dear.” Aziraphale crouches down beside his ancient video camera and holds out his hands and Babylon starts running towards him, a huge smile on her face.

Until she trips and sprawls out on the floor.

“Oh shit-“

“Anthony! Language!”


	3. School

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For as outspoken, brash and opinionated a girl Babylon is, first day of school is still kind of, well, scary

If Babylon is nervous, she’s… She is not hiding it well, Crowley thinks as he looks into the rear-view mirror of his car. Aziraphale is sitting in the passenger seat, talking excitedly about this day. Babylon is sitting in the back, wringing her fingers as she glances out the window, not really paying attention to what her blonde father is talking about. Crowley reaches over to Aziraphale and taps his knee, and the blonde turns towards him, then towards Babylon in the back. He notices then how nervous she seems and shares a look with Crowley as the dark-clad man parks the car. Both turn around to look at her.

“Hey, are you nervous?” She glances at them, before looking down at her lap, nodding slightly.

“Why, pumpkin?”

“I’m the smallest now, dad.” She mumbles and the two blink at her.

“What now?”

“In kindergarten, I was one of the biggest kids, but now I’m one of the smallest.” There is logic to what she says, and the two adults share a look.

“You used to be the smallest in kindergarten too.” Crowley points out and she gives him a look.

“That’s different!”

“We’ll be right with you, my dear. We’ll go inside with you and stay with you until class begins.” Aziraphale says, smiling kindly and she fiddles a bit with her backpack, a nice purple backpack she had chosen herself. She had been so excited when they all went shopping for school supplies, but now that the actual day is here, she’d rather go home and avoid this all together. New experiences are scary. But she nods anyway and unbuckles her belt. The other two follow suit, and Babylon resolutely pulls her backpack over her back and marches up to the school gate, only to pause in front of it, suddenly unsure again, but once Crowley and Aziraphale catch up to her, she grabs a hold of both their hands and lets herself be led inside.

Babylon isn’t the only one who brings their parents into the classroom. She is, however, the only child with two fathers. Babylon never thought much of it. For her, that is normal, having two fathers is normal. They do get the occasional odd look, but Babylon doesn’t notice, and her parents ignores it to the best of their abilities. It’s not like they didn’t expect to get a few looks tossed their way, but this isn’t about them. Today is about Babylon.

And they stay until first period is over. That’s when parents start to trickle out and Babylon assures them she’ll be fine on her own.

“We’ll come pick you up when the bell rings, okay?” Crowley tells her and she nods, reaching up for a hug from the both of them, and then they are out the door.

When they stand outside the car, waiting for the children to leave the school, they talk a bit, both wondering if Babylon had a nice day at school, whether or not she made any friends or not.

“It’s Babylon!” Crowley exclaims. “Of course she’ll have friends! She’s able to charm a politician into telling the truth.” Aziraphale rolls his eyes at his husband.

“Was that supposed to be directed at Gabriel? Even so, charming adults is one thing, charming other children is completely different.” The blonde is worried, very much so, but when the bell rings and children come running out the doors, they see their little girl holding hands with another girl, chatting excitedly together. Aziraphale nearly floats off the ground in happiness and Crowley rolls his eyes at him, despite feeling pretty good about it himself. The two girls stop and chats some more together before a parent of Babylon’s new friend calls out and the girl runs off, waving. Babylon waves back, before looking around for her own fathers. Aziraphale calls out and the girl brightens up as she sprints across the parking lot, much to her fathers’ fright.

“You have to watch where you’re going.” Crowley tells her as she wraps her arms around Aziraphale’s legs. “Cars are driving here.” But she pays him no heed and grins toothily up at the both of them.

“I made a friend!”

“We saw!” Aziraphale picks her up and she giggles at the action. “What’s her name?”

“Bethany! We sit together in class, daddy!”

“You’ll have to tell us all about her then.” Crowley says as he walks around his Bentley and gets in. Aziraphale helps Babylon in and straps her in the seatbelt before getting in himself. The entire ride back to their home is filled with excited chatter between Babylon and Aziraphale, and Crowley keeps mostly quiet as he drives, preferring to enjoy the excitement of the other two, but comes with an input now and then. Aziraphale helps Babylon with what little homework she’s already gotten while Crowley prepares dinner, and when Babylon is done, she goes right back to telling her fathers about her first day at school.

She admits to having been really nervous, (Crowley: “No, really?” Aziraphale: “Anthony…”), but tells them that the moment all the parents had left, everyone had seemed less nervous, and the teacher had finally begun some kind of teaching. They had been reading stories, and the teacher had given everyone who wanted a chance at reading a little bit for the class.

“I read five whole sentences!” She says proudly and Aziraphale looks positively over the moon.

“That’s your influence, not mine.” Crowley says, as he puts plates down on the table. “How many could read as much as you?”

“Two others. The others didn’t seem like they wanted to read much. I think they were shy.” Babylon says sagely and laughs when Aziraphale tickles beneath her chin.

“But you’re not shy, are you, my dear?”

“Nope!”

“Does this mean you’ll read _me_ bedtime stories now?” He teases and she scrunches her nose at him, shaking her head adamantly. Apparently that is not a deal they will strike anytime soon, and her fathers share a look and a chuckle as the girl crosses her arms petulantly.

“Read yourself, you’re an adult, daddy!” She tells him as Crowley puts the food on the table. She slides off her chair to wash her hands before she takes her seat again and starts eating. Afterwards she watches Crowley water the plants in his hobby room, laughs a bit at how he leans down real close to them and growls something unintelligible before moving on. She’s always found it fascinating how he takes care of the flowers, because she’s seen her other father water the plants and tell them how beautiful they are, growing so well for his husband, deserving of all the love Aziraphale can muster for them. Babylon wonders if everyone does it the same way, or if her fathers are just weird.

It occurs to her that it can be both. But it’s funny to watch either way. She also wonders if her redheaded father knows that her other father is nice to the plants. Perhaps the plants are so pretty because they’re caught in the middle of a tug-of-war between her fathers. That sounds like such a fun game, and she wonders if she can participate in it soon too. She’s not going to ask just yet though, because she vaguely remembers having almost ruined one of her father’s plants at some point. He had seemed real sad about that, so Babylon had kept herself to just watching the plants, instead of watering them.

Once that is done, they retire upon the couch, the tartan-patterned blanket wrapped around them as they watch some television. Or, Crowley and Babylon are, Aziraphale is reading a book, with the name Shakespeare on it. Babylon can’t quite articulate the name properly and she’s somewhat given up on trying so late in the day. She’s nestled comfortably between them, one of Crowley’s arms wrapped around her, the other wrapped around Aziraphale as he rests his head against the blonde’s shoulders. Soon enough Babylon hears light snoring behind her and she turns, the action causing Crowley to jerk awake.

“Dad’s falling asleep, daddy. You have to read him a bedtime story.” Babylon says and Crowley grins up at Aziraphale.

“Yeah, angel, read me a bedtime story.”

“Oh good lord.” Aziraphale rolls his eyes, but settles better against the couch and begins to read aloud.

“Not here, daddy! In bed.” She doesn’t know why, but Aziraphale turns a bright red as Crowley shifts a bit behind her and she turns towards her dad, curious.

“Nothing, pumpkin.” Crowley sighs and pulls himself up into a proper sitting position. Or as proper as he is capable of doing.

“No, I want to know!” She demands and yelps as her dad scoops her up and throws her over his shoulder.

“Bedtime, you say?”

“No, dad, no!” She squeals, slapping her palms against his back as he carries her towards the bathroom, and Aziraphale just chuckles and goes back to reading his book, the commotion in the bathroom fading out as he falls into the lull of reading Hamlet again. He expects to be called out of it soon enough, because tonight is his turn to read Babylon a bedtime story. It’s actually mostly Aziraphale who does it, but Crowley often sits with them during that time, adding his own little twists to the stories. Babylon loves it every time. It’s a nice end to their days. And she feels quite content and safe when she drifts off to sleep.

Once the girl is out, the two men gets up and quietly shuts the door behind them. Then Aziraphale swats Crowley on the arm.

“You absolute, wily serpent, you!” He snaps and Crowley reels back, muffling his laughter at the flush on Aziraphale’s cheeks. The blonde huffs and stomps, quietly mind you, towards the living room, plopping down on the couch and resolutely reading his book and ignoring Crowley. The redhead drops onto the couch and crawls over, laying his head in his husband’s lap, peering up at him with his yellow eyes. Aziraphale lasts for fifteen whole seconds before he sighs and drops one hand to brush through Crowley’s long hair. Crowley grins up at him, and Aziraphale rolls his eyes.

“You’re the absolute worst.”

“You love me.” Crowley crows happily and Aziraphale smiles slightly.

“God help me, I do.”


	4. Sneeeek

It takes the combined force of an eight-year-old and a thirty-year old’s pathetic pouts for Aziraphale to give up and agree on a pet snake. A _real_ one. He trusts that Crowley will know what to do, as Crowley at some point did own a pet snake, which died of old age a year or so after they had begun dating. Ah, university. Good times, fun times, really. And how he had scolded Crowley for coming to _Aziraphale’s _classes more often than his own those first few months. Out of the two of them, Crowley is the bigger sap, and the redhead can argue as much as he wants, but it will remain a fact until the end of their days.

So when Crowley and Babylon return with a Ball Python, he really should not be surprised.

“Don’t worry, angel, it’s an ideal beginners snake, just look it up.” Aziraphale does, afterwards, just to confirm it even though he trusts Crowley to think ahead a bit. Crowley is right again, but then again he knows a whole lot more about reptiles than the bookshop owner does. He nearly has a heart attack when his husband tells him Babylon quite liked the geckos too.

“Because God forbid our daughter wants a dog or a cat!”

“You hate cats.” Crowley rolls his eyes and Aziraphale purse his lips. Crowley is right about that too. Crowley has Babylon be very careful with her handling of the snake, and how to feed it. Never let it believe that when she sticks her hand in to lift it up (though that never happens without Crowley around to watch over her) she has food in her hands. No one wants anyone to be bitten. And the snake, Crawly as Babylon has decided to call him, much to Aziraphale’s amusement and a “Ngk,” from Crowley, is quite playful and curious, and he loves being lifted and carried around. One would think that Babylon and Crawly form a tight bond of trust and friendship, if one believe such a bond can be between a pet snake and a human girl.

“Dogs apparently can? Why shouldn’t snakes?” Crowley asks Aziraphale one evening as they lay in bed, Aziraphale reading Hamlet for him for what is probably the thousandth time since they got together. Crowley knows the story by heart now, but he still doesn’t tire of listening to Aziraphale reading it to him. At some point during their relationship, he was so used to it that when they went to their separate families during the holidays, Crowley had trouble sleeping. He’d never slept so well when they had to return to campus and he could hear Aziraphale read to him again.

“You voice a point, my dear.” Aziraphale hums. “It might be I think like this because it’s more normal to have a dog or a cat.” Crowley turns onto his side, one arm wrapping over Aziraphale’s waist.

“You agreed, angel. I can’t return the snake now.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it. Babylon would be so displeased with me. I trust that it’ll be no different than having a dog. The difference is that she won’t take Crawly for walks.”

“True that.”

It turns out that Crawly is the perfect pet for Babylon. She shows a very mature stance on taking care of it, and follows Crowley’s rules to the letter. And she never picks Crawly out of his tank unless Crowley is also home, much more for Aziraphale’s sake than her own. She’s quite comfortable with Crawly after all. She’s also ecstatic about the fact that soon her birthday is coming up (Crawly is a really early birthday present from her fathers) and she can show off her snake to her classmates when they come over for her party. 

“Daddy?”

“Yes, sweetheart?” Aziraphale looks up from where he is folding clothes and sees the girl stand in the doorway to the laundry room, looking a bit unsure.

“What’s the matter?” She runs forward and wraps her arms around his waist, burying her face in his stomach, mumbling something he cannot quite hear into the fabric of his button-up shirt. He pulls her back a bit, asking her to repeat herself and she looks up at him, cheeks a bit red.

“Thank you for Crawly. I know you’re not really comfortable with him.” And the blonde man feels bad, because he never intended for Babylon to catch up on that. It’s not that he is uncomfortable with snakes, he was quite acquainted with Crowley’s pet snake back when they attended university, but Crawly is new, and having a snake in his home again after all these years is a bit weird, but he supposes he will get used to it. He _will_ get used to it.

“Oh my dear, this is hardly the first time I’ve had a snake in close proximity. Your dad had a snake when we first met. You’ve shown you’re responsible, and you have quite earned having a pet. We said you could choose your own, and I am not at all surprised. You take that after your dad. I’ll be just fine, you’ll see.” He assures her, lifting her up. She’s starting to grow too heavy for this, so he does it as often as he can, relishing in it for a little while longer, until he can’t anymore. He sets her onto the counter and continues with the laundry.

“Now, won’t you help me finish folding the laundry, dear?”

“Okay!” It is a quick affair, and they move on to visit Crowley at his flower shop. For Babylon, her dad’s flower shop is just a larger version of his hobby room at home, except that here there are actual flowers too, and not just greenery. She often plays explorer, imagining that she is in a jungle, searching for hidden treasures and exploring a yet to be explored territory. It’s quite amusing when her dad sometimes skulks around, making animal sounds. This time is no different, except that Babylon quickly realizes her dad isn’t skulking around today, so she sneaks around, until she hears her fathers’ talk.

“Gabriel and Michael just called me the other day, saying their coming for Babylon’s birthday.” Aziraphale says and Crowley groans.

“Great.”

“I know you don’t get along, but please be civil, for Babylon’s sake.” That makes the girl frown from where she’s hiding.

“Michael is okay, it’s Gabriel I don’t particularly like. And the feeling’s mutual.” Crowley says with a shrug. It makes no sense to Babylon. When Michael and Gabriel do visit, which isn’t often but still, all the adults seem to get along rather well.

“Also, your cousin called, asked if we could have Newton during winter break.”

“Yeah, sure, whatever. Just don’t let the kid anywhere near the electronics and it’ll be fine.” Babylon lights up at that. Newton isn’t really her cousin, but she calls him that anyway. That’s the only people on her dad’s side of the family that she’s ever met, or know of, and she likes him. He’s a year older than her, but he’s fun, despite his awkward manners. At least he plays with her, and that is the best part of it all. So she runs out of hiding, right up to her fathers’ and jumps at Crowley, who barely catches her.

“Oh, please, _please_ let Newt visit! _Please,_ dad!” And she sets such big orange eyes on him Crowley can do nothing but sigh and nod.

“I said it was fine, didn’t I, pumpkin?” And of course Babylon knows that her dad won’t tell her Newton can’t come over, but it seems like neither her dad nor daddy wanted to have the conversation they were having, so Babylon figured that breaking in would make them stop about the thing that seemed to make them feel bad. So she does her best to keep them from talking about things that make them angry, and has Crowley help her handle Crawly during her birthday-party, letting her friends pet the snake one at a time so the poor thing doesn’t get overwhelmed and scared and lashes out. And suddenly winter break comes around, and Newton is dropped off at their flat.

Babylon is happy because she gets to hold the controller when they choose what to watch on the telly, and she now has a playmate when everyone else is gone for the break. Newton seems to enjoy his stay too, but as long as he’s there, Crawly has to stay in his tank, and Babylon laughs.

“So it’s not only daddy who’s afraid of Crawly!”

“I am _not_ afraid of the snake, my dear.” Aziraphale says and Crowley snorts.

“Sure you’re not.”

“I wouldn’t have married one if I was.” There is a silence as Babylon bites her lip to keep herself from giggling at the innocent smile on her daddy’s face, and Newton looks like he’s ready to run from a wild animal as Crowley just stares at his husband.

“… Ouch.”


	5. Dance Recital

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Every parent screws up a little at some point, Crowley is no exception

Crowley is so fucked. He is so _incredibly fucked_. Being at all her practices, oh that he has managed to do, but to actually be able to be at her actual show on time, oh that he has been absolutely unable to. She’s going to hold this against him for a long time, she’s going to be so damn disappointed with him. At least Aziraphale is there, so she isn’t stuck with a complete shit of a parent. Still, the thought of Aziraphale actually being there on time doesn’t make the redhead slow down any as he races towards the dance school. When he arrives, he barrels out of his car and inside the building. He opens the door to the show-hall and searches, searches in the dark for Aziraphale. It’s quite hard, but he can see someone anxiously turning around and that can only be his husband.

With half-sincere muttered apologies, Crowley finds himself falling into a seat beside Aziraphale.

“Where were you?” Aziraphale hisses and Crowley runs a hand through his hair agitatedly.

“Roadwork near the shop. It was a bloody nightmare to get through. Did I miss it?”

“The first one. She’s about to do her second one now.” Crowley feels bad, because he had promised Babylon he’d be there to watch her dance. She’s been so excited for the whole recital, and he’s missed half of it. Did she notice he wasn’t there the first half? It doesn’t matter, does it? If she asks him what he thinks of the first dance, he’s got nothing to say, because he didn’t see it. And he can’t lie to her, that’s no good. She’s going to be disappointed either way, and probably angry with him for some time. That thought hurts.

But those thoughts are pushed away as their little girl walk on stage with the rest of her group, and dance and move, a little bit clumsy, adorably so, but doing their very best and that is what it is all about anyway. Children showing the results of their practice and enjoyment. Crowley wishes they’d been able to record it, so he could watch it again and again (and tease Babylon with it as she grows older), but mostly, he just wishes he had been on time. But he’ll think of that later. There will be more dance recitals, he’ll be on time for them, he promises that for himself. He grabs Aziraphale’s hand in a tight grip when it’s over, and they see the groups of dancing children take the stage together, all with red cheeks and big smiles as they bow to the cheers and claps from the audience, so proud of their achievement here today. The blonde squeezes back, just as overwhelmed with pride and happiness.

When the children comes out from the dressing rooms, clad in their own clothes and their backpacks on their backs, cheeks still red and breath slightly heavy with their chattering excitement, Babylon immediately searches for her fathers’, finding them standing not far from the exit. She bounds up to them, beaming, and while Aziraphale beams back and picks her up, not without a _little_ bit of trouble, because she is ten years already, quite big, Crowley’s smile is no less wide, but a little strained.

“Dad?”

“Yes?”

“What’s wrong?” She is so perceptive, their little girl, noticing every little thing that bothers them. When she grows up, that quality might become very handy, especially in social situations (Crowley’s never been too good at those), but right now, he wishes he could have hid it until they got home, because he doesn’t want to tell her in front of all these happy little families with their perfect parents. He doesn’t want to show what a cock-up he is. But he can’t lie to her either.

“I’m sorry pumpkin.” He says, pulling off his glasses to look her properly in the eye. Her frown deepens, and she reaches out to him, letting him catch her hand in his. Her hand is so small compared to his. She wonders if she’ll ever have as big hands as he does.

“I was held up. I didn’t make it in time.” Her mouth opens but no words escape her. She just stares at him, brows furrowing and hurt flashing so vividly across her face Crowley swallows hard.

“You didn’t see me dance?”

“Not your first dance, no.”

“But you saw my second?”

“Yes, I did. You were incredible, Babylon.” She seems to chew on this information for quite some time, and Crowley is so worried she’ll be so angry with him she won’t let him read her bedtime story, or even talk to him when he drives her to school tomorrow morning, but she simply nods to herself and looks rather cross with him.

“Be on time next time, yeah?” He laughs, because the amount of _sass_ in the girl’s voice is absolutely hilarious, but she’s also right, and this is her forgiving him if he promises to do better next time. So he nods, wrapping his little finger around hers, and all is forgiven. The drive back home is filled with Babylon explaining in great detail how the first dance went, and Crowley listens with as much attention as he can spare as he drives. She promises to show it to him when they return home, and Aziraphale hooks his phone up to the stereo as he plays the song. Crowley and Aziraphale sit on the couch, huddled together as Babylon, in sweats and a hoodie, performs her dance a second time that evening so her dad can experience it too.

“That was wonderful, pumpkin.” Crowley says as she does her final curtsy, and hurries to clamber onto the couch to curl up between her fathers’.

“I’m glad you could show it to me.”

“Of course I could!” Babylon says, grinning up at him. “But don’t be late next time, or else you’ll have to come up with a much better apology, like another pet snake.” She says, grabbing the remote and turning the telly on. Behind her Aziraphale gives Crowley a look that _dares _him to ever be late to any of her recitals ever again. Crowley makes a mental not to be a whole lot more aware of what is happening around his shop’s neighbourhood for every future arrangements.

For the sake of his safety.


	6. Faith

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Babylon learns many things. And she learns a bit more about who she is as a person

The moment Babylon turns fifteen, she has to do summer jobs to earn money. How great that both her fathers’ have shops of their own, and that she can experiment a bit with what she likes to do. She enjoys both shops, and she’s gotten a whole lot better at caring for plants by helping her dad out at home. Still, she wants to spend time with the both of them, so she alternates between them every two weeks. It’s always amusing to be at the flower shop, because apparently her dad is a real magnet.

For other people’s less-than-subtle desirous eyes.

Too bad for all of them that he doesn’t give a damn about them or their desires, because he’s happily married. It’s still fun to see them try and flirt with him. Some people are absolutely hopeless, some are rather innocent, but some are actually smooth, or just straight up ignoring Crowley’s attempts at ignoring their flirtatious attempts, even when he purposely wraps the plants in a way that shows off his wedding band. Babylon and Crowley has made a game of these kind of people. It is at that point that wily teen Babylon will rush out of the backroom, or just suddenly emerge from the “jungle” as she dubbed it as a young child and refuses to call anything else, and call out loudly, in a _really _whiny voice.

“_Da__~d!”_ And the way the customers’ eyes would widen, and look really uncomfortable is almost as hilarious as the way they hurriedly and clumsily exit the shop. There’s a high-five and a whole lot of cackles after the door is shut behind the customers.

“Seriously, don’t tell your daddy.”

“As if I ever would.” Babylon retorts. This is too much fun, and while Aziraphale will by no means _forbid _her from doing such things, he’ll make a really disappointed face and they’ll both be in trouble, despite the fact that the customers are rather rude to ignore the wedding band on Crowley’s hand.

Aziraphale suffers no such encounters though, and Babylon is happy for it. She’s sure her daddy would feel absolutely terrible about such an encounter, both for the sake of the customer, and for Crowley. Unlike Crowley, who’ll make a game with his daughter to embarrass anyone who just don’t take a polite hint (or ten), he’ll feel like he has done something wrong to Crowley, most likely. And Babylon knows him well enough to know that he will feel like the worst person on earth, and so much guilt over something that isn’t even his fault. So yes, Babylon is happy that the bookshop is mostly quiet, with very few customers, which gives them time to just enjoy each other’s company, reading and drinking tea and enjoying treats.

“I’ll get fat if I eat more of these.” She complains one day, and he tuts her.

“Nonsense! You’re perfect the way you are.”

“You’re spoiling me, daddy.” She groans, stretching out on the couch in the backroom.

“No more than is appropriate, my dear. Now, why don’t you fill me in on the gossip at school.” She raises a brow at him but does as asked anyway. He always seems so giddy when she tells him about the social things at school, and not just about how her schoolwork is going, how her grades are, if she needs help with anything. It’s quite amusing to see him so excited about the info she gives him.

“You know, if this is so interesting, there are a lot of teenage drama’s on the telly.”

“Lord forbid, they’re nothing like reality!” He exclaims and she hums.

At some point in her life, Babylon thinks she was around nine when she asked her dad about it, she had wondered why her daddy went to Church every Sunday, but not her dad. She’s never asked to go with Aziraphale whenever he went, and he had offered her once and she had refused because she wanted to play with her toys. Aziraphale never asked again. But she had asked her dad, and he explained that Aziraphale goes because of his faith.

_“What’s that?” _

_“He believes in it. In God, Her words, her angels. He finds comfort in it.” _

_“Why don’t you go?” _

_“Because I don’t believe in it.” _

_“But if he believes in it, but you don’t, what does that mean? Are they all real? Who is right? Who is wrong?” _Crowley had looked rather thoughtful at that, thinking for some time before sighing.

_“I might be wrong, they might all be real. But I don’t believe, and it’s my choice to not believe. I’ve never once experienced anything that invoked any such faith in me. I’m doing what’s right for me, and daddy’s doing what’s right for him.” _

_“Can I have that faith?” _Babylon had wondered, and Crowley had smiled at her.

_“Who knows? Why don’t you go with daddy next Sunday? Try it out? Maybe you’ll see what I don’t.” _So Babylon had done exactly that. She doesn’t go to church every Sunday, but she always goes with Aziraphale during the holidays. At first, she found it boring because attending a mass usually meant sitting rather still, and Babylon has never been the kind of child who _can_ sit still, but her curiosity won her over. And she wanted to share something with her daddy, the same way she shares her fascination and love for reptiles with her dad. She’s still not sure what she believes, but she attends mass every now and then, and tries to figure it out.

“Not a lot of the teens my age go to church, you know.” Babylon says, fiddling with a necklace she got from her parents at her fourteenth birthday. Aziraphale looks up, expression soft and a small smile playing along his lips. He is so understanding it almost hurts.

“Do you want to stop going? I won’t mind it.”

“Nah, it’s not that.” Babylon waves her hand. “I want to figure out myself whether or not I believe. Not quite sure yet. Some things are so nice, yet some things are quite hard to understand.”

“That is quite relatable. I must admit, I was pleasantly surprised you asked to come along when you were younger. I quite enjoy it when we get ready for mass in the mornings.” He says, but she hears something differently. What Babylon hears is: Thank you for attempting to take part in something I enjoy, thank you for wanting to spend time with me. He shouldn’t have to thank her, it feels weird. She’s his daughter, she loves him and her dad, and she wants to spend time with him. She loves spending time with him. She loves being in his old, dusty bookshop with him, sharing gossip like two nosy old village-ladies while gorging herself on the treats he buys every morning.

When Sunday arrives, Babylon rolls out of bed, a grumbled mess of a sleepy teen, but she dutifully finds herself a rather presentable outfit and tumbles into the shower. Once done, she dresses and dries her hair, finds herself a nice, light blue hairbow to keep her hair out of her face, before she leaves the bathroom and follows the delicious smell of breakfast.

“Good morning.” Aziraphale beams at her, and she wonders how he is always in such a good mood each morning. Still, she returns the smile and they eat their breakfast together, chatting quietly before they leave for mass. During the sermon, there are many things Babylon can admit she finds comfort in. Yet, as always, there are things that make no sense to her. And it gnaws at her. The vicar is a peaceful and nice enough fellow, but as mass is over, and people start gathering together to leave, and Babylon finds her daddy’s hand and clasps onto it, a small smile on her face, she hears it.

There is one lady in church who, while never having actually talked to Aziraphale or Babylon, ever, makes the teen feel uneasy with the way she glares. It’s not at Babylon, it’s at Aziraphale, but her daddy seems entirely oblivious to it. Or he could be ignoring it too, it wouldn’t come as a surprise if he did. Babylon has seen her talk to others while throwing them nasty glares, but she’s never actually heard what she says. As a child, Babylon didn’t think too much of it, just assumed the lady had a bad day. Now that she is older, sees more, understands more, it’s obvious she has beef with them, for some unexplainable reason.

“I don’t understand why _that_ dares show up every Sunday.” And realization dawns on Babylon, that the _“that_” the lady speaks of, is her parent. And for some reason, it _angers _her. Because why wouldn’t it? The clear way the woman speaks of and looks at Aziraphale like he something nasty plastered beneath her shoe is infuriating.

“_It_ has no place here in God’s House.” She’s speaking louder now, and Babylon is acutely aware that her daddy _can_ hear the lady, and a lot of others can too. But no one is speaking up.

“_It_ is unnatural, an abomination in God’s eyes.” Babylon doesn’t want to hear anymore, she doesn’t want Aziraphale to hear anymore either, so she turns towards him, and freezes in place. He’s smiling at her, but his eyes are closed so she can’t see the hurt in them, but the tightness of his smile, the way his jaw is set and the slight wobble to his lower lip… And before she even knows what she’s doing, she’s turned around and stares at the woman.

“Then God is wrong!” And the silence that falls heavily in the church is nearly stifling. People are looking at her, she’s aware of that, and the way the woman’s eyes nearly bulge out of her skull, the way her cheeks flush with anger should have given Babylon a small sense of triumph. It would have if it had been in her dad’s flower shop. But not here. Here, she feels heavily outnumbered, and the only thing keeping her grounded and not running for the hills is the tight grip Aziraphale has on her hand. She licks her lips nervously, swallowing. The woman opens her mouth, no doubt to release a tirade about how Babylon has no idea what she’s talking about, that she’s just a child raised in, well, any word she’s about to say is most likely nasty, and the teen doesn’t feel like letting her get a word in.

“Every Sunday you preach about how God’s word is good and- and righteous.” She begins, swallowing again. Her mouth feels really, really dry. Like she’s been chomping on dry cookies without water or milk on the side.

“How God forgives and loves all of us, how we’re supposed to love each other and accept each other, how we’re all made in Her image. But you’re not being nice or good at all, or accepting.”

“How dare you-“

“No, how dare you!” It must be a rather comical sight, right? How this tiny teenager just keeps on prattling about what the church is supposed to represent and how she can’t see the parishioners actually practicing anything of what they’re so proudly saying they are. To them, this must be a show of a kid having a tantrum, right?

“How is my father any of… _what you _were saying, if anything of what you preach here is true? You’re not accepting of anyone, you just use whatever you feel is useful to your views to push your opinion on others, and you judge them on things _you_ don’t want to accept. You’re using God as an excuse! The way you think is harmful, it hurts others, it causes misery, and _nothing good comes from that_!” She wants to yell, she wants to scream, she wants to shake the woman and toss her into a pit of snakes. No, she doesn’t want to do that, but she wants to get Aziraphale out of there, so she turns towards him, voice cracking with tears as she speaks.

“If being a good Christian means I have to judge people for things they can’t control, for being born the way they are, for _being who they are_, then I don’t want to, daddy. I don’t want to go to church, I don’t want to listen to the vicar. If this is what God wants, then I don’t want to listen to Her. I can’t, it’s _wrong._ I can’t believe in God if she’ll let us be so horrible to each other. It’s not right, we shouldn’t treat people we don’t know like they’re nothing, or something _bad_. I’m sorry, I really am, I wanted to share in this place with you, but I can’t. I just _can’t, _because to me you’re a thousand times better than anyone here could ever be.” And she bites her lip at the astonishment she sees on Aziraphale’s face, before it is too much and she runs as fast as her legs can carry her out of the church, and back home.

“Hey, pumpkin, you’re earl-“ She hears her dad call out as she runs past him down the hall, hears him call out after her as she slams the door to her room and throws herself onto her bed, sobbing into her pillow. She’s really done it now, hasn’t she? Ruined everything for her daddy now, hasn’t she? She realizes now that Aziraphale has probably not been oblivious to all of this over the course of the years, but he has ignored it, risen above it and been the better person, the bigger man. And she just had a real tantrum in front of everyone, hasn’t she? Ruined it all for him. He can never go back to that church now, can he? And that is something he so enjoyed.

Aziraphale and Crowley are the best parents anyone can hope for, and Babylon, their daughter, is the words daughter they could have wound up with. Because she ruins everything, doesn’t she? There’s a knock on the door, she can hear her dad calling out for her, asking what’s wrong.

“_Go away!” _She yells, burying her face in her pillow in an attempt at muffling her sobs. She doesn’t want him to hear her, even though he saw her crying as she ran inside. Thankfully, he seems to realize that she needs to cry it out, that she doesn’t want to talk about it right now, and he respects it, leaving the hall. She reckons that when Aziraphale returns home, she’ll get an earful over what one does and does not say while outside amongst others, and especially in the church. That was his place, and… she had a real, bratty tantrum in there, didn’t she? She’s usually better than this.

But at the same time, Babylon knows that the woman isn’t right. She is so wrong it’s scary. Judging someone based on their sexual orientation is crude, it’s _wrong_. And if this _wrongness_ is what is the norm, Babylon will have no part of it. And if her daddy can’t accept that… then Babylon will most likely be crushed.

There’s a knock on her door again, softer than the other one. It’s Aziraphale, and Babylon sucks in a breath, holding it.

“Babylon? Can I please come in, dear?” He doesn’t sound angry, she thinks, but she’s still anxious. She doesn’t answer, afraid of what’ll happen when he walks through the door, and she shivers, stifling another sob trying to wrench its way out of her. Her tight grip on her pillow has her knuckles turning white and shake, and she bites her lip so hard she tears through the skin.

“Please, darling?” And it’s not fair, because she can’t deny him anything when he asks so nicely, so she chokes out a “yes” before hiding behind her pillow again. She hears him enter, closing the door quietly behind him before he moves towards the bed, and carefully sits down beside her. She waits with baited breath, but when he lays a comforting hand on her back, she can’t help the full-body tremble as she turns and looks up at him.

“I’m s-_sorry!_” Her voice cracks at the smile on his face as he rubs her back.

“You have nothing to be sorry about.” He tells her softly, and she tries to speak, only to break out into more tears because she realizes with relief that he isn’t angry with her, just worried about her, and she just feels so bad for what she did at the church in front of everyone. Just because he isn’t angry with her, doesn’t mean the rest of the people there aren’t. It doesn’t mean he’s allowed back. And she’ll feel so much guilt for it because he really, _really _loves going to church. Once she calms down a bit, her fit reduced to nothing but a few insistent tears and hiccups, Aziraphale urges her to sit up so he can look at her properly.

“I don’t know why you say you’re sorry-“

“Because I had a tantrum at church.” She hiccups, looking down at her hands in her lap. “I just started yelling and causing a scene. They’ve probably gone to church their whole lives, I’ve only been going for a couple of years. I didn’t have any right to say all that.” She mumbles, sniffing as Aziraphale lifts her chin to make her look at him.

“Whether or not someone’s been going to a church longer than anyone else doesn’t determine who has a right to say what. You have a right to your opinion, just like everyone else. I’m rather proud, actually.” Babylon furrows her brows, confused.

“You’re right, the priest preach about looking upon each other as equals, about being good to each other and accepting, but not everyone can accept everything. For some, their faith is the only thing keeping them together, and for some, their faith has been taught to them, and every opinion they have, might be opinions they have inherited from their parents. When you’ve been taught something your whole life, it’s hard or scary to unlearn it. And they stick to what they know, what they feel safe and comfortable with knowing.”

“But that doesn’t make it right.” Babylon mutters. “I don’t care what that bitch –(“Language!” Aziraphale admonishes) has been taught to think. It’s 2016, for god’s sake. Two men being together isn’t bad, two girls being together isn’t bad, liking both genders isn’t wrong, not being attracted to anyone isn’t wrong either. Just because it isn’t like what she wants it to be, it doesn’t automatically mean _bad_.” In Babylon’s opinion, it might be better. She’s never asked much about her biological parents, but they were obviously man and woman, or else she wouldn’t be here. But they were what the woman in church thinks is the only right way to be, and they had given Babylon up the moment they saw her. Given her to her fathers, and she can’t thank them enough for that. Because here were two who really wants her with them.

“You’re right, but I’m afraid there will be people thinking that our situation is, well, unnatural.” She can see how hard it is for him to admit it, how sad it makes him, and she leans forward, wrapping her arms around his neck in a tight hug.

“I’m sorry, daddy.”

“You don’t have anything to be sorry for.” But she does feel sorry. Sorry that someone as sweet and caring as him has to face ridicule and nasty comments just for being who he is, and it’s not right. She’s also sorry she won’t be with him in church anymore.

“I am sorry though.” She mutters, pulling back. “I’m sorry, daddy, but… but I won’t come to church with you anymore. It’s not… I can’t go there, because I can’t do the same thing as you. I can’t have faith. I can’t believe in something like God, because… it’s just so weird, not that I think believing in a higher power is weird, but believing in something that is supposed to be perfect, and then that it created people like _her…_” It’s hard to explain it to him, because she can’t quite find the words.

“I… it-it’s just wrong. For me. I want to share something with you, like I do with dad, but not the church. It’s just… I see people like her everywhere outside of church, I can’t go to a place where… it’s just hypocrisy, you know?” And he smiles at her again, so reassuring as he caresses her cheek and brushes away the last remnants of her tears.

“That is okay, Babylon. You tried, and I am happy you did. You went, you thought good and hard about it during these last few years, and you came to a conclusion that it isn’t for you. And that is okay.” She bites her lip again, looking down before quickly looking back up.

“So you’re really not mad?” And he laughs.

“No, no I am not mad. I am actually quite proud of you, you handled it as maturely as you could, and you made good points. Do you want to know what happened after you ran?” She kind of do, and kind of don’t, but she nods anyway, and Aziraphale tells her how a lot of the people at the parish had come up to him and apologized for having had to go through being ridiculed and experiencing hatred for something he can’t help, how they had praised him on having raised such a compassionate daughter. Even the priest had come up and apologized for not having noticed the unrest amongst the devout.

“So… It worked out? You can still go there? I didn’t ruin it for you?”

“Oh dear, is that what you were thinking?” The blonde teenager nods and he laughs a bit.

“Nothing to worry about. We’re both still welcome there. As for having something in common, why we still have our little fancy lunches and treats at my shop, don’t we? We both enjoy them quite a lot, don’t we, darling?” And he’s right, and she laughs, a watery giggle as she nods and she feels a whole lot better about it. He manages to lure her out of her bedroom, the both of them quite surprised to find themselves alone in the flat, but shrug it off and sets about baking cinnamon buns, because they want to surprise the redhead when he returns. And when he returns, he literally runs into the kitchen, looking quite like a cartoon character with his heavy breathing and worried eyes.

“I bought you a new snake! Will you talk to me now?” And true to his word, in his hands is a young Brazilian Rainbow Boa. Babylon is too surprised, staring at the beautiful snake, to notice the way her daddy stiffens behind her.

“Anthony, dear.” And the smile the blonde sends the redhead can only be described as _terrifying as fuck._


	7. Better Than Our First Date?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because why not enjoy themselves?

“How about this one?”

“No.”

“This one then?”

“Oooh, yes, that one is nice. And this.” Crowley says as he dumps a dress into his daughter’s arms, arms which are already quite full of several articles of clothing he wants her to try on.

“As much as I appreciate this, dad, I’m going to be gone for a week, not a month.”

“Better to bring a little too much than not enough.” Crowley says as he yanks a shirt off a hanger and tosses it onto the ever growing pile.

“I already have a lot of clothes!”

“You can do with a little more.”

“Daddy’s not going to be pleased.”

“Daddy’s got no say in the matter.” Crowley sasses her and steers her towards the changing rooms. She gives him a good-natured look before disappearing inside, thankfully for her already quite full ward-robe managing to throw out at least half of the outfits. Still, they still exit the mall with an enormous amount of bags. Aziraphale is not going to be pleased, no. But still, this is her first school trip out of London, she’s going to enjoy it.

When the time comes, Aziraphale and Crowley sit alone in the apartment on the first night, feeling rather, well, it feels empty. It’s so weird. Fifteen years of the girl’s constant presence, and even if she’s only supposed to be gone for a week, it’s so unnatural.

“This is weird.” Crowley says and Aziraphale nods, putting down his book, as he has read the same passage three times without actually picking up any of the words. He sighs and sinks in his seat, before glancing over at Crowley.

“Wine?”

“Oh yeah.” Crowley watches his husband get up and find two glasses and a bottle of red.

“You know.” Aziraphale begins as they settle properly on the couch again. “With Babylon gone, it’s almost like when we just moved in together.”

“Are you starting to feel old, angel?” Crowley teases and the blonde rolls his eyes.

“Far from it, my dear. I just feel like, without her here, we can, well.” He trails off and Crowley raises his brows, yellow eyes filled with amusement.

“Relive our glory days? Want me to take you out for dinner, just the two of us, to a fancy restaurant, go out dancing, stay out all night stargazing?”

“I wouldn’t mind that, no.” Aziraphale wiggles a little in his seat, looking quite amused and Crowley takes a sip of his wine, motioning for the blonde to come closer. Aziraphale settles in the crook of his arm, feeling quite comfortable like this.

“That can be arranged. Any specific ideas?”

“I’ll leave it all up to you, love.”

“Alright then, surprise it is.” The redhead grins, probably already planning ahead.

Two days later Aziraphale is surprised by Crowley appearing in his bookshop right before closing time, He’s dressed sharply, black jeans and a dark turtleneck, his hair pulled back into a half bun behind him and a modest but still rather beautiful bouquet of flowers. The gesture is so sweet, and he accepts it with a small kiss to his husband’s cheek.

“These are lovely, Anthony.” The redhead hums, watching as Aziraphale moves about trying to find a vase to put the bouquet in. He checks the time as he waits, before holding out his arm for the blonde when he returns from the backroom.

“Come on, angel. We’re going out for dinner.”

“Oh, I wish you had told me earlier, so I could dress properly for the occasion.” The blonde says and the redhead looks him over, before planting a kiss on his temple.

“You look absolutely stunning. Don’t worry about it.” Aziraphale positively glows at the praise, blushing prettily by it even after all these years. It is rather endearing, and Crowley loves it. He remembers back when they first started dating, how he sometimes kept on flattering Aziraphale, not only because it seemed fitting and Aziraphale deserved the compliments, but also to see how long he could keep that rosy hue on his cheeks. The answer is, for hours.

But he’s planned something nice tonight, like how they used to be when they were younger, before Babylon. The way Aziraphale gapes at him when he stops outside the Ritz, is worth the tiny fortune he had to pay to get through the reservation list. The blonde hangs onto his arm as they enter, looking like he fell in love with Crowley all over again as they are led to their table.

“Order whatever you want, angel.” Crowley tells the blonde as he agonizes over what to choose on the menu. He seem reluctant for a moment, until Crowley raises a brow at him. Aziraphale decides to give in and order what is the most tempting to him. They enjoy a three-course meal, with Crowley just nursing his glass of wine as he watches Aziraphale absolutely delight in the desserts. He remembers their first date, how Aziraphale had been rather hesitant to eat to his heart’s content. Thankfully, after all their years together, he is no longer embarrassed about it. It is enjoyable to watch. Crowley has always liked watching Aziraphale enjoy himself. Once Aziraphale is done, and has primly dabbed his mouth with the napkin, he turns towards Crowley and beams at him. That smile still makes Crowley’s heart skip a beat. Nice, isn’t it? Having been in a relationship for, what, over seventeen years, and they still feel this overwhelming adoration and love for each other over the simplest of things.

“This was lovely, my dear.” He says, wiggling in his seat. He is very satisfied with their little dinner-date, but Crowley is far from done. He went all out with this one. So once the bill is paid, and the waiter tipped, they leave the restaurant, but instead of fetching a cab and going back home, Crowley links his fingers with Aziraphale’s and pulls him along down the streets, until they are outside St. James park. It’s starting to grow dark out, and as such the park is so different than it is during daytime, but it’s a pleasant evening, a slight breeze barely noticeable as they walk. Suddenly, when they are about to pass by the bench they usually sat at back when they were younger, when Babylon played in the park as a young child, Crowley stops, and pulls out his phone. Aziraphale tilts his head, but shakes his head good-naturedly when the redhead deposits the phone on the bench and begins playing music. He even laughs a bit as Crowley pulls him along and they dance in the dark, quiet park. They’ve never been particularly good at it, dancing that is, but no one is there to watch, so it is rather enjoyable anyway.

“We’re making fools of ourselves.” Aziraphale chuckles and Crowley shrugs, pulling the other man closer.

“No one here to see.”

“Ducks can.”

“Bloody ducks!” And Aziraphale laughs a bit louder, but neither lets go of the other. It’s nice, and a bit cliché, but not all clichés are bad. This one is rather pleasant, and pulls Crowley a little bit closer, sighs and lets himself be led to the slow beat.

“Tonight was very lovely, darling.”

“An upgrade from our first date, isn’t it?”

“Our first date was lovely too.” Crowley makes a sound, as if he’s not quite agreeing, but Aziraphale only chuckles again.

“It was.” Because he really does feel that. Just because not everything went according to Crowley’s plan back then, it doesn’t mean it wasn’t enjoyable. Aziraphale had found it so incredible, feeling warmth bloom in his chest at the way Crowley had tried so hard back then to make things absolutely perfect for him. No one had ever gone through so much trouble on his behalf before. It felt… well, _good_, to be prioritized.

“Shall we head home? I do know we have a bottle or two of Chateauneuf-du-pape.”

“Of course we have, it’s your favourite.” Crowley pulls back long enough to grab his phone and turn off the music, before his hand find Aziraphale’s again, and they walk home.


	8. Clever Girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because the world isn't all sunshine and rainbows. And it sucks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, been a while for this one! Also, I think the next one might be the last one

Babylon isn’t supposed to be home before Sunday, but a large group of her classmates had wanted to go home earlier, and Babylon had tagged along with the group who went back with a bus alongside the second teacher. When she enters her home, she pauses at the sight of her dad’s leather jacket on the floor. She can chalk it up to him coming home late last night, and just dropping it on the floor, that is normal.

But it’s already past twelve in the afternoon, so why hasn’t her other father picked it up? She decides not to think too much about it, and toes off her shoes and move further in, only to see her daddy’s jacket on the floor too. Now _that_ isn’t normal. And their shoes, and t-shirt… She hears muffled laughter further in and spins on her heels, goes back to the hall, pulls on her shoes and heads back out, texting Bethany and asking if she’s got time to hang out for a bit, using the excuse that she’s been locked out and forgot her key. If Bethany wonders why the blonde didn’t just call her parents, she doesn’t voice it.

Babylon thinks it’s fine since it’s Saturday and she’s free, that she let her parents be alone for a while. She can’t quite recall the last time they had been alone together for such a long period of time. Usually the longest was if Babylon went out to visit her cousin Newton every odd weekend. And that wasn’t often. Letting them have a bit of quality time together, that’s just nice, isn’t it? As long as she doesn’t have to hear anything she doesn’t want to.

So Babylon takes the bus and heads on over to the shopping centre, and the two girls find themselves sitting at a café with a milkshake each, talking about their latest school trip, school work, the latest gossip and much more.

“Oh.” Bethany pauses in their conversation and looks down onto her phone as it buzzes with a message. She lets her finger brush over the screen, before grinning.

“Lucky you.” She says, smirking at Babylon, who raises a brow, straw of her milkshake trapped between her teeth.

“Whaf?”

“Caleb’s single.” Bethany sing-songs and Babylon just stares at her, releasing the straw from her grip.

“And?”

“Don’t try and act cool. Everyone knows you’re into him.”

“I’m not!” Babylon protests, and groans when she realizes she denied it a bit too quickly, and that Bethany can see straight through her. With a sigh she acquiesces before waving her hand, motioning for Bethany to keep going. So Bethany gives her all the juicy details on Babylon’s crush’ breakup. Babylon raises a brow the more she hears, frowning.

“She didn’t seem like the type to cheat, though.” She mutters, thinking back on Caleb’s ex-girlfriend. She had seemed like a rather sweet girl, really. But, don’t judge a book by its cover, that’s what her daddy tells her. Quite often. So maybe, beneath that layer of a sweet girl, she might actually have some rather serious flaws. Babylon tries not to judge, because she remembers vividly that day in church when a woman called out such nasty things to her daddy. Babylon doesn’t want to be like that.

“I’ll hook you up.” Bethany says airily and Babylon raises a brow.

“You just told me he got cheated on. If that’s the truth, then I doubt he’ll want to date anyone any time soon.” The blonde tells her friend who is furiously typing on her phone.

“Bethany, do you hear me?” There’s a soft sound coming from Bethany’s phone and she grins victoriously at Babylon. The blonde raises a brow, before accepting the phone as her friend hands it over. She stares at the screen, at the words having been sent over the chat, and frowns. Something isn’t quite right, and she voices it, but Bethany waves her worries away.

“Go on, go out with him, grasp the chance.” Before Babylon can say anything, Bethany’s snatched her phone back, and is typing a reply.

“No, don’t-“

“Aaand you’ve got a date in twenty minutes.” Babylon scowls, because she didn’t want this. If it is going to happen, it should have happened on her terms. With her asking, her taking the initiative _after_ Caleb got over being cheated on, if he truly was, and not as some sort of rebound girl. Babylon loves Bethany, she really does, but the other girl is far too quick at making decisions without thinking it all through. Babylon isn’t like that. Not for matters like this.

“I’m going to the toilet.” She grumbles, pushing her milkshake away from her with more force than is strictly necessary as she stand up. Bethany looks confused at the dark expression on the blonde’s face and calls after her.

“Babylon? You’re not leaving, right?”

“Bathroom!” Babylon semi-yells, just a bit too loudly but also too annoyed to care. Once she locks the door behind her she fishes out her own phone, pausing a bit as she thinks of who to call. She can call her daddy, but he’ll just be so overly worried she doesn’t want that. She can call her dad, but he’ll so utterly suspicious of it all and tell her to come home and do something- actually, she can’t bring herself to call them because they’re enjoying some time alone, just the two of them. She doesn’t want to break that up just yet. Michael, well, she’s a no nonsense lady, she’ll probably say the same thing as Crowley. But Gabriel, he might have some words of wisdom to share. So she calls her uncle Gabriel.

“_Hello, kiddo, it’s been a while.” _

“Hey, uncle Gabe.” Babylon greets him back, even though she knows he absolutely hate that nickname. “I, um, I need a little bit of your wisdom, since you’re a great actor and a splendid liar and all that.”

“_From anyone else, and your dad, that would have been a compliment…” _

“You know I don’t mean anything bad by it. It’s just… I’m apparently going on a date.”

_“And you’re calling me why?” _Gabriel sounds honestly confused and she gets it. He’s a politician, he gives her advice on how things work because he knows she’s a little bit interested in politics, he helps her with certain assignments in which she needs to do some research into how society works and such things. She doesn’t call him about _romantic adventures._

“There’s this guy-“

“_And I’m not the one you want to have this conversation with.”_ Gabriel says, sounding rather uncomfortable. “_That’s something you should talk to your parents about.” _

“I don’1t want to. This is your expertise, kind of, no offense.” Babylon mumbles.

“_Why am I suspecting that your next words are going to do just that? Offend me?” _Babylon pauses and thinks over her words, rephrasing them already.

“I’ve been invited out on a date by a guy, but according to rumours, his girlfriend cheated on him recently. Am I a rebound girl? Can I trust that this is sincere-“

“_Not a snowball’s chance in Hell, kid.” _Gabriel cuts her off, and she frowns, already having expected this response, but not exactly feeling any better by it.

“_Not a single man will go for a date just moments after having broken up with someone who cheated on him. Same for women. If it’s as recent as you claim, I really doubt the rumours of him being cheated on are true. Watch your back there, Babylon.” _

“See?” She says quietly, her free hand tugging on her jacket. “Told you you’d be able to help me.” She hears a sigh on the other end, but Gabriel doesn’t say anything at first. He can probably hear the slight disappointment in her voice, because even though she suspected this to be the case, it doesn’t make her feel any better at being able to avoid the situation. Because she really did crush on Caleb.

_“Listen, Babylon.”_ Gabriel starts. “_There are good people, and then there are garbage. I’m just glad you’re of the perceptive kind, clever enough to understand when something isn’t quite right. Maybe I am wrong in this too, who can say, but just to be absolutely sure, keep away from the boy, yes?” _

“You’re right.” Babylon says, straightening her back, perhaps not feeling that much better, but a bit more confident, because yes, she is clever, she is perceptive, and she doesn’t judge people without knowing them. She wants to find Caleb’s ex, ask her the truth about it. So she heads back to the table where Bethany sits, and Caleb is there too with a few friends.

“There you are.” Bethany says, and Babylon smiles at her.

“Right, here I am. See you, I’m going home.”

“What?” Bethany sits up straight, and Caleb shifts in his seat, looking up at her confused.

“I’m going home.” Babylon repeats but only manages one step from the table when Caleb reaches out and grabs her arm. She stops, and stares at his hand.

“Oh, uh, Caleb, don’t-“ Bethany starts, but the boy ignores her.

“I came out here because you wanted a date. You can’t just leave now.” He smiles charmingly, and Babylon narrows her bright eyes.

“I never agreed to this.” Babylon says as calmly as she can, tugging on her arm. Caleb’s grip tightens, and she scowls.

“She really doesn’t like it-“ Bethany tries again, but Caleb waves her off.

“That’s not what I heard. Come on, I came all the way down here.”

“Let go of me. I don’t like being touched.” Babylon says, voice tightening. She doesn’t like this, not at all. She doesn’t feel safe, not at all, and she just wants to go home. Bethany is standing up now, moving around the table and most likely thinking about making the two of them break up.

“You owe me-“ And that’s it. Babylon yanks her arm back, finally free.

“I don’t owe you shit. I don’t even know you. I know your name, that’s about it, but I don’t know you. I didn’t ask you to come down here, so no, I don’t owe you anything. Come on, Bethany, let’s get out of here.” Babylon says coldly.

“If you think a girl owes you anything just because you did something you consider nice or a chore, then you’re a real, miserable piece of work, you got that?” She adds and grabs Bethany’s hand, yanking her along.

“Babylon!” Bethany demands the moment they’ve left the shop. “What was that about?”

“You know where his ex lives?”

“Well, I know of someone who knows. Why?”

“Because I want to see her.” Babylon says simply, and Bethany stares at her for a long time before finally asking.

“Why?”

“Because I want to know the truth.”

“We know the truth.” Bethany insist but Babylon stops and levels her with a glare.

“We know what the rumours say. Rumours doesn’t necessarily equal truth. Just ask my uncle.”

It’s already dark outside when Babylon finally returns to her own home. Her fathers are sprawled out on the couch. Well, Crowley is sprawled all out over the couch, Aziraphale is sitting as prim and proper as ever.

“Pumpkin! You’re home early! Well, we knew that from the bag in the corridor, when did you return?” Crowley lifts his hand in a wave, smiling. Aziraphale looks up from his book. Their smiles falter when they see the expression on her face though. They’re quick to make space for her, and she shuffles over to sit between them, pulling her knees up to her chin.

“Babylon, what happened, dear?” Aziraphale asks as he drops his book onto the table. She feels her lower lip wobble a bit as she crosses her arms over her knees.

“I called uncle Gabriel.” She starts, and she can feel her dad tense up beside her, probably ready to say something snappy because God knows the two of them don’t get along and for some reason he always thinks that Gabriel might have said something to hurt her.

“I asked him a few questions, didn’t want to bother you two.”

“You could never bother us, my dear.” Aziraphale says, laying a hand on her shoulder in a comforting manner.

“Well, you sounded occupied when I came home…” She opts for a bit of teasing, just to lift the mood a bit and nearly giggles at the sight of her daddy’s blushing cheeks and her dad’s strangled choke.

“But I called uncle Gabriel, asked him about a guy Bethany thought I should date.”

“What, Gabriel knew the kid?” Crowley asks and Babylon shakes her head.

“No, not like that. I just… there are rumours that a girl cheated on him, they broke up a few days ago, so I thought it was weird when Bethany asked him out for me, without me agreeing to it, and he agreed immediately. Showed up a few minutes later. I didn’t… I didn’t feel safe there, so I took Bethany with me and left. And we found his ex, and asked her if we could have the truth, and, well… Uncle Gabriel was right.”

“What did he say?” Aziraphale asks quietly, softly, presence warm and steady beside her.

“He said to stay away. There was no way the boy was the victim. And he wasn’t. His ex is the victim. And I could have ended up the same way, and that scares me, because I don’t deserve that kind of treatment, no one does.” Crowley makes a mental note to call Gabriel later and thank him for the advice he gave their daughter, because the girl is shaken by just learning that she might have been treated so badly too. And she is right, she doesn’t deserve that kind of treatment, shouldn’t even be worried about it happening. Crowley also feels the slight urge to find this kid, and have a chat with him. But that won’t really help anyone, will it? Instead he wraps his arms around his daughter and presses a kiss to the top of her head, and along with Aziraphale he tells her sweet nothings, of how much they love her, how good she is, how she has so much to offer and that she will find someone someday, that they’re happy she sought guidance when she was uncertain. It seems to break her, and she starts crying.

“Everyone’s been treating Sara real bad because they believe the rumours. That could have happened to me too.”

“It’s a scary thought.” Aziraphale agrees. “But you know the truth, so you can stand by Sara’s side, support her and take her side, if you want.” Babylon sniffs and nods.

“I promised her I’d be her friend.” Babylon says. “I knew something wasn’t right, but I feel so stupid now, because I really was attracted to him. Why can’t I be as lucky as you two?”

“Hah, I won’t say…” Crowley begins but trails off. “Er, it’ll be fine, sweetheart. Things seem bleak now, but it’ll get better. Not every guy is like that, you know.”

“No, I know.” Babylon wipes her eyes and sighs.

“Thanks, dad, daddy. So, now I need to find a new crush.” She is just joking, because she doesn’t exactly feel like wanting to be with anyone but her friends and family right now, but it’s worth it to see the way her dad’s yellow eyes tighten a bit.

“No need to stress, yeah? I mean, you’re just a teenager, still got a few decades on you, right, angel?” Aziraphale makes a noise of agreement, and Babylon laughs.

“It’s okay to say you’re not ready for me to get a boyfriend yet.”

“Oh we’ll never be ready for that, I’m afraid.” The blonde man sighs.


	9. Basilisk Is Best Snek

Babylon is at her daddy’s bookshop during the Saturday. She’s still not quite gotten over the entire fiasco with Caleb a few weeks ago, and she’s not exactly keen on talking much with Bethany either. It’s not like she is furious with the other girl, but she feels more than just a bit annoyed with the way Bethany had kind of just overruled Babylon’s own wishes back then. She just needs some time away to calm down so she doesn’t say anything she’ll regret. Bethany had told her she understood, but that still remains to be seen. She had appeared properly horrified of learning the truth from Sara though, so who knows.

Basilisk is hissing quietly in her air and she turns her head slowly. He is tilting his head at her before snaking down over her shoulders to attempt at nestling beneath her shirt.

“No, you don’t.” She says softly, carefully pulling the snake out of her shirt. “We’ve talked about this, Basil. Beneath my jacket, sure, beneath my shirt, no.” She admonishes the Brazilian rainbow boa as she lets it curl around her arms. She sighs as the snake finally settles, curling a bit up herself to keep the snake warm. Not that it’s cold in the bookshop, far from it, but it’s comfortable like this. And she’s glad that her daddy is more than used to her bringing one of the snakes along when she visits him at the shop. She doesn’t have any plans today, but she is also very bored because her daddy has actual customers today, for some ungodly reason, and therefore Babylon is alone in the back with her snake. Well, the bookshop is good, it’s safe, it’s _comfortable_ and _quiet _and she can be left alone.

She isn’t sure when she drifted off, or how long she was asleep, but she’s jolted awake by her phone buzzing, and there’s a cup of tea beside her which has cooled down so she guesses she must have been out for a bit. Basilisk hisses at being woken up so rudely and Babylon soothes him with careful strokes over his scales.

“Sorry, Basil. Didn’t mean to wake you.” She mumbles as she sits up, which is kind of hard when your pet snake is winding himself around your hands and arms and absolutely refuses to let go, but she manages, and reaches out to grab at her phone. Basilisk hisses again, not pleased with being held so far away from Babylon’s warm body and slithers up her arms and down her chest again. The blonde rolls her eyes at his antics and snags her phone, sees a text from Sara. The girl is asking if Babylon is up for a visitor. The blonde thinks for a bit, before texting back and telling her new friend that she is at her daddy’s bookshop and that she’s welcome to come over there, that her parent will soon be bringing about snacks and pastries. Sara replies quickly that she is on her way.

Sara is sweet, just as Babylon had initially thought before she knew her, and the whole ordeal with Caleb left her quite excluded from her former social circles at school. Because rumours are more likely to be believed than the truth. Babylon, in an act of spite had, with Bethany backing her up, spread rumours of how Caleb had tried to _guilt_ her into going on a date with him, and grabbed a hold of her and refused to let her go when she tried to leave, not only just to counteract the terrible gossip being spread about Sara, but also to keep other girls who are willing to listen to keep away and take care of themselves. Babylon isn’t proud of spreading those rumours, but she’ll also be lying if she said she doesn’t feel a little bit (a whole lot, actually,) satisfied with the way Caleb is suddenly rebuffed by girls and the glares he’s sending her way.

_‘Glare all you want, you pathetic excuse of a boy.’_ She had thought back then. She doesn’t like judging people she doesn’t know, but she knows the truth of his actions here, and she will judge him for his arrogance, his stupidity and his belief that he has the right to treat girls like that. Because he really, really, really, really, _fucking really_, does not. She isn’t proud about spreading the rumour, but it had been a spur on the moment thing, to counteract anything Caleb said about Sara.

She grabs the teacup and takes a sip, grimacing. Too cold. She’ll need to make a new one. Basilisk wraps himself around her upper body as she slowly gets up, and lets her keep her arms free, as if he understands what she’s going to do. She puts water to boil on the stove, because God forbid her daddy actually has a proper electrical kettle which she can use, dear that could be _modern_, and his shop doesn’t _do modern. _She rinses her cup and finds the tea-packages, waiting for the water to boil. Basilisk keeps on hissing quietly and she strokes his head in a soothing gesture. Her snakes like the bookshop, but she can only ever bring one at a time. Aziraphale is more used to the snakes now, really, and he doesn’t really react when Babylon or Crowley walk around their home with the animals wrapped around them, but Babylon, for his sake, tries to be a bit careful, still.

The water finally boils, and she fills the cup with water and a teabag, grabbing a spoon and stirring it. She takes a seat on the couch and carefully sips the tea, careful not to burn herself. Basilisk is curious, tongue flicking out and she pushes him back.

“No, no, we’ve tried this before. Smelling it is okay, but don’t try drinking it. Dad will be so mad if he figures out you tried again.” She says, getting up again and filling a bowl with water. She lets the snake sip from it as she drinks her tea, before she realizes that maybe she should warn her daddy that she is expecting visitors. Basilisk refuses to be put down in his travel tank, so she sighs and allows him to come with her. Aziraphale is used to it by now, and she hopes he won’t be too annoyed with her bringing the animal into the space where his customers walk about. There is one mother and child, and the child is excited about the snake though the mother is not.

“He’s not scary.” Babylon assures, and the girl begs her mother to be allowed to touch the snake. The mother seems unconvinced, and rather unsure, and Babylon assures that Basilisk is a calm, friendly snake who’s never bitten anyone. So she reluctantly agrees, and Babylon kneels down and holds Basilisk in a firm grip. The Brazilian rainbow boa moves his head closer to the girl, and the girl listens to Babylon and lets Basilisk come to her. He flicks his tongue over her fingers and she twitches and giggles, until the snake pushes his head into her hand for all of three seconds before pulling back and wanting to wrap around Babylon again.

“See.” Babylon snickers. “You can go back to school on Monday and say you touched a real snake this weekend.” The girl nods enthusiastically and then turn to her mother and proceeds to tell her how the scales felt beneath her fingers.

“It was really smooth!” The girl says and the mother nods along, seeming a bit better about the whole situation the further Babylon moves away with the snake. The teen feels like she might have pushed a bit too much, the mother at least, but Basilisk is a good snake, and it’s a terrible stereotype that they are vicious animals. In Babylon’s opinion, snakes are the most honest animals there is. Her daddy is with another customer, a handsome enough man, Babylon supposes when she gets closer and gets a good look at him. What she also notices, is how the man is standing just a little bit closer than what is normal and isn’t actually paying attention to any of the books and is more or less staring at her daddy. In a way Babylon doesn’t particularly like. It’s how people often stares at her dad in his flower shop before he flashes them a look of his weeding band.

The difference between Crowley and Aziraphale is that Aziraphale doesn’t _realize _that he’s being ogled and flirted with. Bless his naivety. And when Aziraphale turns around towards the shelf, and the man’s eyes trail every so slowly downwards, Babylon feels something snap, and is vaguely aware of Basilisk raising his head to look at her as she stalks forward. Aziraphale turns back around with a smile, holding out a book for the customer, who accepts it, but doesn’t quite let Aziraphale go as he lays his hand in a way that traps Aziraphale’s hands to the book.

“Daddy!” Babylon whines in the most bratty, drawn-out drawl she’s ever managed to articulate. The customer jumps and nearly drops the book, but Aziraphale just turns his head towards her, smiling despite being confused about the rather unusual tone of voice.

“Yes, my dear?”

“Sara is coming over soon, that’s okay right? She wanted to spend some time with me, and I said I was here, said there would be lunchtime soon and that she could join us. That’s okay, right?”

“Why of course, the more the merrier.” Aziraphale pulls back his hands and claps them together happily, doing a little wiggle. Babylon knows he enjoys it when she brings friends along to their little lunch-dates, because he enjoys seeing her with her friends and getting to know them. Sara is new, he hasn’t had the chance to speak to her yet, and he’s jumping for the chance.

“Also, my phone died, can I borrow yours to call dad and ask if he can drive us to the movie theatre later?” She asks sweetly and Aziraphale nods.

“Oh, of course.” He moves to the cash-register and begins rummaging about to find his cell phone, as he never once actually carries it on him while in his shop. While he does that, Babylon turns towards the customer, who looks rather put out, slightly glaring at her, and she plasters on the widest, chilliest, pearly white smile she can produce, and the man _almost_ takes a step back at the thinly-veiled threat in the teenagers eyes. It doesn’t make it any better when she drags her thumb slowly over her throat, and Basilisk raises his head, and bless the reptile, he hisses threateningly, as if he realizes that Babylon does not like this man. Crowley would have been so proud of his girl if he had been there to see this. The man stumbles back a bit, and hurries over to the desk, and lays the book down. Aziraphale blinks, but hands his phone over to Babylon, all sweetness and smiles now, who takes it and moves to stand a bit behind him, calling her other parent as she stares at the customer.

“Hey, dad.” She says, keeping eye-contact with the uncomfortable-looking man as Aziraphale rings up his purchase.

“_Hey, sweetheart. What’s up?”_

“Sara will be coming by soon. Would you mind driving us to the movie theatre once you close up shop?”

“_Sure, shouldn’t be a problem.”_

“Thank you. Love you.”

_“Love you too.” _Crowley says before she hangs up and gives her father his phone back, placing a quick kiss on his cheek.

“Thanks, daddy.” She says as she moves to disappear into the back, though the customer swears he can hear hissing follow him all the way out to the door.

Not long after, Sara enters the bookshop, glancing around curiously. She’s never actually been inside the shop, though she’s known for some time where it’s located. She sees a blonde man dressed in light colours look up from where he is shelving some books, smiling at her. She knows who he is, despite never having actually talked to him.

“Hello, Mr. Fell. Is Babylon here?”

“Oh, you must be Sara. It’s a pleasure.” He sets down the books he’s holding and grabs her hand in a firmer handshake than she had expected from someone who looks as soft as he does. But he is beaming at her so brightly, and his hands are warm, and she feels, well, _safe_ in this space. Despite never having been there before.

“Babylon is in the back, with Basilisk. We’ll be going out to eat lunch soon, Babylon said you might like to join us?” Sara doesn’t know who or what Basilisk is, but she nods anyway.

“Oh, I, uh, I don’t want to intrude…” Sara says uneasily and he shakes his head.

“Nonsense! We’d be delighted for you to join us. Now, off you go. She’s probably napping again, she’s been napping all day, she takes that after her dad, goodness.” Babylon’s father says as he directs Sara to the backroom. Sara smiles at the man, likes him already, before she enters the backroom, and nearly shrieks at the sight of Babylon sprawled out on the couch with a big snake all over her. She claps her hands over her mouth to stop startled scream nearly escaping her, and takes a few deep breaths as she realizes that both the girl and the snake are fast asleep. So she edges closer, very, very slowly and carefully, not wanting to wake the snake before the girl, and carefully shakes Babylon.

“Babylon, Babylon, big snake, big snake!” Sara hisses and Babylon jerks awake. So does the snake, and it hisses, but to Sara’s credit she doesn’t recoil. Much.

“Ah shit, sorry, Basil, didn’t mean to disturb ya.” Babylon grumbles sleepily as she rubs at her eyes. The snake hisses again, before slithering up to rest its head across Babylon’s collarbone.

“Big baby.” Babylon mutters as she sits up, and when the snake reaches out for Sara, the other girl pulls away a bit.

“No, no, come here.” Babylon moves across the couch she’s been reclined on and allows Sara to sit beside her. It takes some time.

“You want me to put him away, maybe?” Babylon asks and Sara bites her lip.

“It’s not… aggressive, is it?” Babylon shakes her head.

“Nah, Basilisk here is as calm as they come, aren’t you, boy?” The snake hisses again, but it doesn’t sound threatening, more like it’s… purring? Like it’s very satisfied.

“Then… No. Just, uh, I don’t want to touch it-him?”

“That’s okay.” Babylon says. “Not everyone is comfortable around snakes. I can put him away, if it’ll make you feel better.”

“No, no, he seems very… satisfied where he is. It’s like holding a cat, innit? Except it’s more, uh, scaly and has no legs.” Babylon laughs at that, and stands up, actually putting the snake into a tank.

“Yeah, actually, it kind of is like that, but I’m not going to force you to be around something you’re uncomfortable with. So, I hope you’re hungry, daddy is taking us out to lunch in a little while.”

“So I was told.” Sara says as she watches Babylon fasten the top of the tank. The snake seems distressed for a tiny moment, before curling around on itself.

“Is that… normal? Being like that?”

“Hm? Oh, nah, he’s just slept on me all day. He likes the warmth, and he wasn’t happy at being separated from it. But he’ll live. Crawly’s just the same.”

“Crawly?” Sara questions.

“My other snake. Got him when I was eight, I got Basilisk a year and a half ago. Pretty big already, actually. Oh, I hope you don’t have anything planned for later?”

“No, nothing. Why?”

“Thought about going and watching a movie. Dad’ll drive us in the Bentley.”

“_The _Bentley?” Sara has a thing for old cars, Babylon knows this, and grins.

“Yeah. Once he’s closed his shop, he said he could drive us. You up for that?”

“Oh _am I?_ Is Bethany coming?” At Sara’s question, Babylon’s smile fades a bit, and shakes her head.

“Haven’t asked her.”

“You’re not avoiding her, are you?” Babylon winces, and looks down and side-ways. “Babylon.” Sara admonishes and the blonde pouts.

“I’m not avoiding her. I’m just… annoyed with her.”

“Because?”

“Because she would rather believe the rumours about you and Caleb than actually finding out the truth. She didn’t once entertain the thought that it might be the other way around.” Sara frowns, but running a hand through er dark hair.

“That’s stupid of you, miss I-Don’t-Want-To-Judge-Anyone.”

“Excuse me, what now?”

“Bethany did what everyone else did. And she didn’t know me, but she knew Caleb somewhat. Of course she’d rather believe Caleb than the person she didn’t know. I don’t know how you were raised, to be able to look past that and look into things, but I am happy you are. Now, can you look past your own annoyance and not judge Bethany for doing what everyone else does?” Babylon gapes at the other girl, before flopping over onto the couch beside her, hugging her side-ways.

“Aah, Sara, darling, you’re amazing, you know that?”

“Of course I know.” Sara says, glancing over at the snake tank and the restless snake in it. “You know what, take him out, I want to take a look at him, as long as his stare doesn’t kill me.”

“Caugth that Harry Potter reference, did you?” Babylon mutters, but fishes out her phone, sends a quick text to Bethany, before she ambles over and removes the lid to the tank. Basilisk coils around her arms with an appreciatively hiss, licking at her cheeks as she carries him back to the couch.

It takes Sara quite a while before she actually dares to even just poke the reptile. When Aziraphale comes back into the room, Basilisk is put in his tank again, with clean water and food, before they move down the streets for their outdoor lunch.

“I’m so glad you joined us, my dear.” Aziraphale says after they’ve ordered their food.

“The pleasure’s all mine, Mr. Fell. Thank you for having me.”

“Oh, all of Babylon’s friends are welcome at any time. Especially if they can keep her from scaring off my customers.” Babylon chokes on her water.

“W-what now?” She coughs, caught off-guard by her daddy’s words.

“Really now, darling? You think I didn’t notice what you and Basilisk was doing to that poor man?” Aziraphale smirks at her and while Babylon looks like a fish out of water, Sara nearly falls out of her chair while trying, and mostly failing, to contain her giggles.

“Your dad will hear of this.” Crowley will scold her in front of Aziraphale, but the moment the blonde is gone, he will most likely fist bump her and tell her to carry on. Still, the only thing Babylon manages to articulate is:

“Ah, shit.”

“Language, young lady.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of Ineffable Family. I tried so hard not to let this thing develop an actual plot, I think I was half-way successful. However, if there are things you'd have liked to read more about, don't hesitate to yell at my on my tumblr blog: ServantOfMischief


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